A Reflection on Loss and Grief

I have been up quite a while this morning.  Working on lesson plans that need to be posted.  Realizing I need to make sure I have a sub coming in for me - possible snafu.  Worrying about friends.

One of the lessons I have been working on is the Earthquake of 1906 in San Francisco.  So many things came out of that devastation.  It was the first Earthquake disaster to be  photographed.  I read that it is one of the most important quakes because of the scientific information that came out of it.

I compare that to our own individual disasters.  Many people do not realize the scope of problems until it happens to someone close.  Many older women did not have careers outside the home.  These women are often totally dependent on Social Security.  Lets pick a number from the sky - lets say the husband gets $2000 dollars a month.  The wife would draw about $900-$1,000 depending on variables.  Many women are unaware that if the husband dies first they will continue receiving the $900.  This is a loss of 2/3 of the income that had been coming into the home.

Did you know that if a person goes into some hospice homes or a nursing home the institution receives all but $50.00 of the person's social security check?  Many times family members must also contribute more money to pay for this care. I didn't know that the spouse can be required to contribute additional money from their social security.  I was under the impression that our laws had changed to protect the surviving partner from financial devastation.

There is a small amount of money known as the Social Security death benefit $250 that was set up to help with burial costs.  It is only paid if there is a surviving spouse or dependent children under the age of 18. This amount of money has not changed since the 1970s.  If the couple is not legally married this money is not paid. 

For many couples not only do they lose their life-mate but often their homes, their independence and their pets.  Health and a change in finances are big factors.  Some of these families have pets that can not go with them to their new residence (nursing homes, relatives, etc).  This compounds the loss and grief that the survivor experiences.

For many older Americans, Social Security is their only income.  In the midst of grieving they are pummeled by each new loss.  Now the dominoes start to fall as we wonder why many elders are living in poverty.

How do you figure the cost of death? 

My Love Hate Affair

Technology - my friend - some days not.  I see myself as technological competent.  I work hard to stay knowledgeable.  Somedays I see myself as technological clueless.

Take my ipad.  I have had it for awhile and am just now trying to set it up to send email and to send imessages.  The imessage one seems to be where I am struggling.  I get this message "recipient can't receive messages check your network"  Ahhg  I want to scream!

That's about the time when Hank drops his toy on my nearby computer keyboard and wants my attention.  How can I admit to myself that I haven't a clue at what I'm doing.

What do I do - I google.  How do you set up.  I read directions.  Yes done that.  Success?  No.

I experiment with my own addresses to see if I have been successful.  Ok I now can send a picture by email.  Still not by message.  Ahh I will wait until a later hour and see if I can talk to a friend who is a technology whiz.

I always feel so dumb when I can't figure out how to do these things myself.  I feel like such a charlatan when people refer to me as their technology go to person.  I always look over my shoulder to see who they are talking about.  Then realizing oh they meant me.

When they come with questions.  I usually answer-" well lets looks at it and see if between the two of us we can figure it out.  What have you already tried?  What do you think the problem is?  What are you trying to do? Alright, lets see what happens when we do this."

I love technology, but I hate feeling so ignorant.  Technology is SOOOO FRUSTRATING.

My History Fix

Stories matter.  I love hearing good yarns, well told tales.  I relish the stories of real people.  2014 marks the 100th anniversary of Montana Women getting the vote.  One of the sites for great glimpses into stories about Montana women is at Montana Women's History.  http://montanawomenshistory.org/

Teaching Montana History http://teachingmontanahistory.blogspot.com/ by Martha Kohl.  Is another favorite blog.  She shares lots of resources, many that would be applicable to other parts of the country.

Teaching History. org http://teachinghistory.org/  is a site I'm sure many are already familiar with.  If not block out some time and enjoy.  It is a site that I go to frequently.  The History Project http://historyproject.ucdavis.edu/ is full of resources for teachers.  

I've already shared Montana Moments http://ellenbaumler.blogspot.com/ by Ellen Baumler.  I lover her humor.  It always amazes me the gems she shares.

Classroom Practice and Chronicling America

The webinar went well at least until the lights went out at our school towards the end of the session.   It was the first time the Library of Congress had used google hangout to present a webinar.  The team said they had about 50 people watching live.   It is archived on YouTube and is available to watch at  http://youtu.be/jw-YErEvlUU .  

Diane Cormack from Harrison County West Virginia was the other librarian that spoke about using Chronicling America in the classroom.  There were two ladies, Deborah and Robin that work directly with the Chronicling America Program.  Cheryl Lederle was the host from the Library of Congress.

We were asked questions about what ways we had used the newspapers in the classroom.  Then Deborah and Robin explained that the newspapers are in public domain through 1922 and 36 states have digitized newspapers for the program.

One of the things I did not know is that some of the newspapers are in other languages.  Many immigrants settled close to each other and published newspapers in their native language.  When I heard that I thought what great resources for classes studying a second language.  To be able to read about communities while learning another language.

It really turned out to be fun and I got some new ideas.  Diane said she laminated the newspapers and let the kids use dry erase markers to circle new vocabulary.  I thought that was a great idea.  

I believe Chronicling America is the closest thing we have to time travel.  Today I had the opportunity to talk about using the historic newspapers with kids.  I enjoyed the experience even if the lights went out.

Lemon Pie With History

One of my favorite cookbooks is the one I bought from the Current Catalog back in July of 1983.  It was a blank book.  The page format that I use - Recipe from, date I got it, recipe, serves.  If there is room sometimes I have added the back story.

I decided I would share the story of the Lemon Pie Recipe.  During the summer of 1998 I attended a Bead Society Potluck and ate a wonderful slice of lemon pie (pre gluten free life).

Ruth Clancy, a lady in her late 70's, was the pie maker.

I expressed my delight with the pie and she graciously shared the recipe and story.  She had gotten it in 1945 from an elderly lady who had had it for at least 50 years.  

Lemon Pie

1-1/2 cups sugar

1-1/2 cup boiling water

3 Tablespoons butter

6 Tablespoons cornstarch

3 egg yokes 

4 Tablespoons lemon juice (squeeze real lemons)

Mix cornstarch and sugar together, stir in water and yokes.  

Over direct heat in cast iron skillet cook until thickens.  Add zest of lemon.  Pour into baked pie crust.

****

I have often thought that this is a lemon pie recipe with history.  I always smile when I come to the part of the cast iron skillet.  I still cook with my Mom's cast iron skillet, the one she bought in the 1940's.

An Invitation

I am nervous and excited.  Tomorrow I will be participating as a panel member for the Library of Congress Webinar on Chronicling America. Chronicling America is part of the National Digital Newspaper Program.  http://chroniclingamerica.loc.gov/  They have some newspapers dating back from 1836 - 1922.

You can find newspapers about the Titanic, Abraham Lincoln, the fight for the 19th Amendment and so much more.  It is a rich vein for mining primary resources.

This will be the first time they have used google-hangout for their format.  I understand that it will also be available on YouTube afterwards.


Join us for a webinar on teaching strategies for using historic newspapers on March 27, 2014, 3:00 EDT.  The Library of Congress Education Team in partnership with the Teaching with Primary Sources Program at Metropolitan State University of Denver is pleased to announce its first-ever Hangout for March 27th at 3:00 p.m. EDT.  The panel will highlight the historic newspapers available through Chronicling America and discuss teaching strategies for using the materials with students.  More at https://plus.google.com/events/ck8pho5oja4s76h83730c8ofiq8

Wish me luck.

Favorite History Reads

Ellen Baumler writes about Montana History.  She finds interesting stories and shares them with humor.  Two of her titles that I really enjoy are Montana Moments and More Montana Moments.  The stories are short and well told.  They are great read-alouds.

She has also written a collection of "Ghost Stories":  "Montana Chillers: 13 True Tales of Ghosts and Hauntings";  Spirit Tailings: Ghost Stories from Virginia City, Butte, and Helena.

For a flavor of her writing check out her blog Montana Moments http://ellenbaumler.blogspot.com/.   It was from Ellen's work that I first learned about Camel's in Montana during the Gold Rush era.

Another writer I have recently been introduced to is Lauren Tarshis. She is the writer of the historic fiction series "I survived".  The books are written for kids but are solidly researched.  I am currently reading "I Survived the San Francisco Earthquake, 1906" to my 5th graders.  The books provide the hook and background knowledge for working with primary sources around the event.

When I told my students that Lauren Tarsis was a female author they looked at me and said, "The author is a girl?  How do you know?"

"She was in Billings in October and I got to hear her talk about her books at a luncheon."

It is always fun to find new reads and authors?  What are some of your favorites?

Picture Books Not Just for My "Littles"

In case you didn't know I love books! Small ones, big ones, funny ones, scary ones, true ones, and fantasy.  History is my passion though.

At times I pair favorite pictures books with primary sources (historic photographs and historic newspapers.  My older kids come to the library once a week for an hour, this includes check out time.  It is always fun to read a story and then show them an actual newspaper clipping about it.  I often hear "Is that real?"

I love the Picture Book format because I can read one during class and the next week we can examine the primary source.  There are so many wonderful writers.  I believe that Picture Books are not just for my "littles".

Here are a few of my favorites.

When Marian Sang:  the True Recital of Marian Anderson 

Marian Anderson: Realizing History Through Song
http://blogs.loc.gov/music/2013/04/marian-anderson-realizing-history-through-song/



"Nobody Knows the Trouble I've Seen" - recording http://lcweb2.loc.gov/diglib/ihas/loc.natlib.jukebox.10169/default.html

http://www.findingdulcinea.com/news/on-this-day/April/Marian-Anderson-Sings-in-Front-of-75-000-at-the-Lincoln-Memorial.html  Marian at Lincoln Memorial

Papa's Mechanical Fish by Candace Fleming

http://www.therebreathersite.nl/12_Atmospheric%20Diving%20Suits/1856_Phillips/1856_Phillips.htm

Interview with the Candace Fleming  http://forum.teachingbooks.net/?p=10721

Philip Lodner

Marching With Aunt Susan by Stacey Schuett

Sept 26, 1914 Montana Suffrage Parade http://chroniclingamerica.loc.gov/lccn/sn85053121/1914-09-26/ed-1/seq-1.pdf

Woman Suffragists (reference to red shawl) http://chroniclingamerica.loc.gov/lccn/sn83045462/1898-02-14/ed-1/seq-1.pdf

The Wonder Horse by Emily Arnold Cully.*
(*Check the author's note for other primary sources)

http://chroniclingamerica.loc.gov/lccn/sn83045366/1906-04-19/ed-1/seq-8.pdf  (2nd Column)

Cookies

Cookies & Milk
Freshly Baked
Frozen
Holidays
Frosting
From the store

The List Goes On

Some I like
Chocolate Chip
Macaroons
Thin Mints
Peanut Butter
Snicker Doodles
Scotchies
Haystacks
Oatmeal Raisin

The List Goes On

You eat them
With milk
With tea
In your lunch
At celebrations
After school
In the Park

The List Goes On

You share them
Family
Friends
Classmates
Strangers
By yourself
With your children

The List Goes On

You make memories of
Shared times
When they baked
Who made them
Whose recipe
Who ate them
Where they were

The List Goes On
Until the memories stop.

Juxtaposition

Yesterday was spring.  Today we got snow.  Winter is staying late.

Tonight we went to the Hospice Home to see a friend.  Pulling up I saw my first Robins of the year.  There were 10 of them on the roof.  All fluffed up against the wind.

I watch one head pop-up from inside the rain gutter.  His head peeks over the side,  looks around, then down it goes. Up, down, around.

We watch for a couple of minutes. Opening the car door I watch them fly up.  Walking I notice the icicles hanging from a bush.

Inside we laugh, and talk.  I watch my friend and the love of his life say good-bye.  Their love is palpable - strong, sweet, and timeless.  K. our other neighbor is taking her home.  Tomorrow I will pick her up so they can spend time together.

As I look out the window, snow has begun to fall again.  I think about our life stories - a colleague is expecting a new baby, my nephew and his sweetheart will say I do in May.  June will mark seven years since my Mother passed away.

As I walk out I look for the Robins.  They have not returned.  Another missed opportunity.  Determining to bring my camera tomorrow - I snap the icicles with my phone. Tomorrow is full of possibilities.

An Epic Journey

My first bicycle was a used blue Schwinn bike.  My Mother paid a princely sum of $10.00, quite a lot of money for the 1960's.  She didn't know how to ride, but she made my Dad teach me.

Our house sat between the High School and Grade School where I grew up.  Behind our house was the baseball field and the football field. Dad took me down to the baseball field to learn to ride.  I remember trying to peddle through the soft powdery dirt.  When I would fall off the bike, the ground that met me was hard as a rock.

Dad's idea of teaching me to ride was to get me on the bike hold it  while I peddled and then give me a push and tell me to keep my balance and peddle.  Eventually I was able to peddle and keep my balance.  I loved that bike.  I remember feeling the wind in my face and the sense of speed as I traveled on the streets of our small town.

There came a day when something broke and I took it to my Dad to fix.  Unfortunately he was not very mechanically inclined and the bike got taken apart but never re-assembled.  I wouldn't experience the freedom of riding until I was in high school and in another town.  That  bike was also a Schwinn and had a banana seat.  I don't remember the model name but after looking on ebay I think it was probably a Stingray.

I wrecked it my senior year in high school and never rode very often after that.  I really didn't care for riding in gravel and rocky terrain.  I always admired the people who went mountain biking and rode so effortlessly.

In the late 1970's I was living in Helena, Montana working at Fort Harrison when I ran across some photos of the Bicycle Corp from Fort Missoula.  My interest was captured and then stumbled on an article about them in the Army Times.

In 1896 the 25th Infantry Regiment (an African American Company) was stationed at Fort Missoula (Missoula, MT).  The 25th was one of the most respected units of their time.  Most people would know them best as one of the "Buffalo Soldier" units.  The 25th was made up of African-American NCO's and enlisted men and white officers.

Second Lieutenant James Moss was assigned to Fort Missoula and the 25th Regiment.  His claim to fame at that time was having graduated at the bottom of his West Point class and for being a bicycle enthusiast.  He believed that the bicycle could prove invaluable to the US military.  When he filled out all the forms and requests to test bicycles at Fort Missoula.  His letters found their way to Major General Nelson A Miles, Commanding General of the US Army from 1895-1903.  He would later be known as the Army's "patron of military cycling".

25th Infantry Regiment, 1890 Fort Keogh

You may best remember him as "capturing" Chief Joseph in the Nez Perce campaign.  In 1877 General Miles was stationed at Fort Keogh (outside of Miles City, Montana).

General Miles approved Moss's request and the first test was to Glacier Park.  There would be other tests.  Tests of their skill, knowledge and dedication against the attitudes and prejudices of their day.  Their's was an epic journey.

http://www.stuhrmuseum.org/research/BicycleCorp.htm

Further Exploration:
Hell on Two Wheels http://armyhistoryjournal.com/?p=396
The Bicycle Corp  http://www.stuhrmuseum.org/research/BicycleCorp.htm

The Immortal 15 http://www.nps.gov/yell/blogs/The-Immortal-15-Fort-Yellowstone-and-Buffalo-Soldiers-Part-2-of-2.htm

Out of Sync

I woke to find 4 sets of eyes staring at me.

It was late afternoon of an emotionally grueling week.  Lack of sleep and exhausted I came home and fell asleep in my chair.  I woke up about an hour later 6:30pm to 4 sets of eyes staring.  The eyes belonged to my dogs and 6:30 is supper time.

Lady our chocolate lab is diabetic.  So mealtime for the dogs is regimented.  They know how to tell time even when I have lapses.

The alarm goes off at 5:30 am unless they decide they want out earlier.  One or the other will come in and nudge me.  Max will lick my hand until I respond.  All of them if they are not quickly successful will put their head under the covers and prod me with their cold nose.

Occasionally they will allow me to sleep in like this morning.  My phone had died so the 5:30 alarm didn't go off.  My husband woke just before 6:30.  None of the dogs had stirred - we all over slept.  And my day has been out of sync.

Happy Birthday Charlie

"Five, five, five who'll give me ten, now fifteen, fifteen, fifteen sold to #71."

I had bought 3 boxes unseen.  - The auction lasted over 5 days and I arrived on day 3.  And the items were numerous.  Unfortunately I was not to learn the real value of the boxes until it was to late.  You see they were in the basement when my home was vandalized and the basement ended up more than a foot deep in water.

Inside one box was  a scrapbook and two photograph albums.  There were several pages of photos recording a funeral.  The funeral of Charlie M. Russell.

Both of these stamps depict some of Charlie Russell's paintings.  I believe he created over 1400 pieces of art (sketches, paintings, sculptures).  

He was 16 when he came to Montana.  He started by working with a sheepherder. He had always wanted to be a cowboy and soon followed his dream.  He sketched the land and people as he kept watch over the cattle.  In 1886-87 blizzards killed thousands of cattle in Montana.  

Charlie Russell painted a postcard sized painting later named "Waiting for the Chinook" and mailed it off in response to an inquiry about the well-being of the owner's herd.  This painting told it all and was to mark the turning point in Charlie's career.

http://www.cowboysong.com/cards/cardsridgleya1.html

In 1888 Charlie lived among the Bloods in Alberta Canada (part of the Blackfeet nation).  Many of his paintings told of life in the west from the Indian point of view.

The Custer Fight

"The Gift" by Ian Tyson     http://youtu.be/GPpBHAgP7Zs

Further Exploring

Charles M Russell Museum https://www.cmrussell.org/

http://www.legendsofamerica.com/ah-charlesrussell.html

Nancy Russell http://montanawomenshistory.org/behind-every-man-nancy-cooper-russell/

Anger

Anger

Not being heard

Accident
Shards and slivers
Strewn over table and floor
Slice
Emotions
Slivers of anger
Pierce
Pinpricks
Droplets of blood

Dreams
Lay like
Broken shards

Not heard
Slivers of Anger
Shards of broken dreams.

God Loves You When You Are Dancing

"God loves you when you are dancing."  That is a line I heard on TV yesterday.  The name of an album by a young man from Australia.  That line has teased me all day.  As I opened my computer another blog popped up on my reading list, "Following the Whispers".  I think there is a theme with these lines.

I am reminded of a friends quote "Don't postpone your joy." Glenis Redmond.  Finding joy in each day is my goal.  There are days when that is easy other days when I want to pull the covers over my eyes.

God Loves You When You Are Dancing

God loves you when you are dancing
Reminds me of the admonition to always
Praise and thank God for all my turmoils.
Praising and giving thanks reminds me
That I have many blessings.
"DON'T POSTPONE YOUR JOY."

I remember the time
I followed the WHISPERS and watched
One winter night the rabbits dance,
I am reminded that all gods creatures play
The river otters slide on snow
Prairie Dogs romp and play

I hear the whisper in my mind
"God loves you when you are dancing".

Greycliff Prairie Dog Town

Greycliff, MT Post Office

The sentry was on duty.  As I came closer he stood and barked - warning of intruders.  Then quickly scampered to his burrow.  Scanning the village, I watch as other heads pop - up like people peeking over their cubicles.

One of my favorite state parks is "Greycliff Prairie Dog Town".   It is located between Big Timber and Columbus.

Prairie Dogs at Greycliff

Black tailed Prairie Dog at Ulm

This barking squirrel makes me laugh as I watch their antics.  When I read the Lewis and Clark Journals one of my favorite passages was about taking all their men and spending several days trying to catch prairie dogs to send back to President Jefferson.  In my mind I see these 40 men crawling on their knees trying to capture the prairie dogs with their bare hands.  I can only wish there had been a video recording it would have won America's funniest videos.

One of the journals talked about taking buckets and kettles and pouring water down the holes to try and get them to come out.  They did send one live prairie dog back to the President and he made it there alive.

The World In Black and White

"Mrs Ferris, long ago was all the world black and white?"

I looked at my student and finally grasped he was literally asking me if color was something new.  I had been working with 4th and 5th graders with primary sources.  I had been using black and white photographs.

My youngster had been examining pictures that dated back to the 1880's. (Really old time.) Previously my students had asked me if there were cars back in the 1990's.    I swear there are days when I would guess that some of my students believe I grew up playing with dinosaurs in my back yard.  Yes the concept of time is a bit shaky.

On one level that question is funny.  On another level it shows critical thinking.  Evidence-all pictures from long ago are black and white.  Today all pictures have color.  I would guess most of my kids have never owned a black and white TV.  Probably never seen a traditional camera.  Film is a totally unknown concept.

I could see that the idea of no color had troubled him.  He could not imagine a world in black and white.

Potholes

The pothole could have eaten my car.  I drive a small Prius so it is not real big, but it doesn't like holes.  It doesn't like snow and ruts either.  My husband drove it in the alley when the snow was kinda melty.  The ruts had gotten soupy.  As he drove through the alley I could hear crusty snow grating on the metal undercarriage as he drove over it.  The tires were digging into the ruts.   Oh yes, the pothole.

Potholes are a sign of spring in Montana.  Most are average sized, easily seen and avoided. But the other day I was surprised.  I had turned down the street to go to Walmart.  As I was coming to the stop sign I saw it.  Just feet away.  It was about 6-8 inches deep.  Probably 4-5 feet across.  See I told you it could have eaten my car.

It was straight ahead.  I patted myself on the back for seeing it in time.  Thankfully there was no oncoming traffic as I swerved to avoid it.  As I drove around it, my imagination painted a  picture of the tires snapping off as the pothole ate my car.  Scary huh.

Some people judge spring by the arrival of the Robins (I haven't seen any.)  Some people by when the daffodils start popping up.  (No not me.)  For me it is officially spring when I start seeing potholes.  

Now I will begin mentally mapping the potholes and take bets with myself of if and when they will be filled.  Spring is officially here - I have seen the granddaddy pothole.

Yesterday

Yesterday I read a post from Inspiring a Love of Reading about writing from  a word http://inspiringaloveofreading.blogspot.com/.   I thought I would use this inspiration to do todays slice.

Yesterday

I am planning to read "I Survived the San Francisco Earthquake of 1906
by Lauren Tarshis
When I think of Lauren Tarshis I think of hearing her speak
in Billings, MT this year
She talked about her series
and the magazine she used to edit
Then I think of all the books in her series what a great format
I will use them to scaffold teaching about primary sources
I want them to have some background knowledge
Then we will look at Chronicling America and other primary sources
When I think of Chronicling America, I think of time travel
Being able to read historic newspapers
Reminds me of sharing "I survived the San Francisco Earthquake of 1906.

A Bucket of Daffodils

In the spring when I see the first daffodils; my memory returns to the day I saw a carpet of yellow daffodils surrounding an old log cabin skirting the edge of newly turned field along a windy backroad in Idaho.  Memories return of picking the flowers - their fragrance.  But mostly the stark beauty.

I was in high school and we were on a windy backroad in Idaho.  As we topped a hill, an old homestead was on the right side of the road.   The old log cabin still stood at the edge of a newly turned field.  The soil was dark loam.  Across the road were tall trees, probably pines. But my eye was drawn to the bright yellow color surrounding the cabin.

Images spring to mind- the battered metal bucket, old log cabin, freshly turned field, tall trees, daffodils and a windy road.  Not single daffodils in a small patch, but a  carpet of yellow daffodils surrounding the cabin.  There wasn't even a path to the door but a solid lawn of yellow daffodils.

We stopped and picked a bucket of daffodils.  I was surprised to find that there were two kinds - double daffodils and regular daffodils grew together. I remember transporting that bucket of daffodils, the sloshing of water as it occasionally escaped when we hit a bump as the motorhome went down the road.